boscomantico wrote:
Do you really have to spend all your free time together? Why?
If I and my wife had spent all non-working time together while we had small kids our marriage wouldn’t have lasted, that’s for sure! It’s crucial that both spouses can spend time on interests outside the family. Of course if one spouse doesn’t have any interests outside family (and work), then you have a problem.
As a father of two (8 & 5yr) to a certain way it is funny to read questions as "do you really have to spend all time with the family ". Actually, no one is obliged to, and as the saying goes: “there are different ways to Rome”.
Assuming my standard office week (hence excluding the home office work thanks to Covid-19 currently), during the week I see my kids shortly in the morning and a little bit before they go to bed, hence they actually just see me during the weekend. And then it would be, at least from my perspective, tough to go flying for a full day every weekend.
Currently I take one weekend-day per month for a flying day, and sometimes the kids join (my wife doesn’t like flying at all but is supporting my hobby).
Every second week I have a day per week where I start working later, and use the morning for some shorter flights or training…
Long story short: Blocking some time per week or per month definitely helps and, from my view, is the only way to get to flying on a regular basis…
Edit: Just for the sake of completeness: I not saying to spend the whole spare time with the wife, I’m spending most of my free time with the kids.
boscomantico wrote:
Frankly, that sounds quite terrible. Do you really have to spend all your free time together? Why?
I don’t wish to speak for him, but I believe what @MedEwok was getting at is that a hospital doctor does not have very much free time at all (rather than the embuggerance of having to spend most of it with his family).
Graham wrote:
I don’t wish to speak for him, but I believe what @MedEwok was getting at is that a hospital doctor does not have very much free time at all (rather than the embuggerance of having to spend most of it with his family).
Indeed. In fact, my days are not that much different from what @MikeWhiskey described above:
MikeWhiskey wrote:
Assuming my standard office week (hence excluding the home office work thanks to Covid-19 currently), during the week I see my kids shortly in the morning and a little bit before they go to bed, hence they actually just see me during the weekend. And then it would be, at least from my perspective, tough to go flying for a full day every weekend.
The difference is that I work at weekends, evenings and nights as well, so I have even less time to spend with my family then he does. I agree with the sentiment that it would be “tough” to go flying then for a full day every week(-end).
Doctors in Germany and Austria really are public servants.
I met a doctor in Germany who was the only primary physician for three towns and he said on Christmas Eve one year he saw 120 people in a day.
He said he won’t retire because he cares about all the people and they can’t find a replacement for him because no-one wants to work in the countryside.
I knew a few doctors in Austria who worked far more than I did but made less, which was boggling to me.
It is extraordinary that doctors in these regions support socialist health policies.
Clearly, they are not a greedy group, and should be shown a good deal of respect for their public service.
AF wrote:
It is extraordinary that doctors in these regions support socialist health policies.
Maybe they understand something called solidarity.
The reality of many couples – as anybody who has had a family will know – is that there is zero time for anything, apart from merely existing, with the constant treadmill of getting up, getting kids ready and to school, doing the same in reverse in the evening, and both parents exhausted and more or less just falling into bed to sleep.
As I wrote, I was divorced 21 years ago and it happened as a direct result of my wife wanting this lifestyle and absolutely refusing the possibility of a babysitter (“I am not having some stranger messing with my kids”). I am uncomparably happier now, with a new partner of 17 years (I mean for 17 years; she isn’t 17 
) but much of the 21 years was really hard work, and obviously very expensive (I mean TBM-size expensive). One lives and learns, as they say.
There are solutions but they can’t be implemented if one party doesn’t want a change. And, unfortunately, many women do want this life. Especially as the 30s steadily move along… It brings the ultimate security.
AF wrote:
It is extraordinary that doctors in these regions support socialist health policies.
Clearly, they are not a greedy group, and should be shown a good deal of respect for their public service.
Well, this os completely off-topic, but I feel like an explanation might help to understand.
In the US, a doctor can earn a multiple of what we earn in Europe. At my level of qualification (specialist/consultant) one can probably earn several 100k / year there, which over here is only possible as head of a clinic or in a very well running private practice.
However, this is offset by very high costs for studying medicine in the US, and constant threat of litigation.
In Germany, the cost of the entire human medicine course is estimated to be around 250k€. These costs are largely borne by the taxpayer, as there are no or only very small fees for attending university. I only paid 1500€/year, which included a railway ticket for the entirety of Lower Saxony. Also, I received about 8000€ of BaföG, a kind of student loan by the state, of which you only have to pay back half, at 0% interest, starting 3 years after finishing the course at the earliest.
In return for this generous conditions, one implicitly accepts lower pay while treating patients insured with public healthcare. Private patients (10% of the population) are fleeced where possible, but even that is limited by strict regulations on doctors pay.
MedEwok wrote:
In the US, a doctor
Disappointed but what followed, I was expecting “In the US, a doctor flies an A36 Bonanza and get to see patients at FBOs”
Peter wrote:
is that there is zero time for anything
I think that is what it boils down to 
In the UK lots of consultants earn several hundred k too. I am sure they do in much of the rest of “wealthy” Europe also.
I have just had a regular skin mole inspection. £200 for a 30 min slot. OK; there are significant overheads but work that out over a year. The consultant is solidly booked all year.
Another one I know does cataracts; he does two a day for 2.5 k each.
Another one does boob jobs. 5k for a pair, and two pairs a day.
These people have plenty of time for leisure too – IF they choose to set the time aside and stick to that objective. The mole doc also flies GA The book doc also flies GA, though he is temporarily out of it.
